Key Verse
“People can tame all kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and fish, but no one can tame the tongue. It is restless and evil, full of deadly poison.”
—James 3:7–8 (NLT)
The Idea
Words hold tremendous power. They can bring comfort and clarity or tear down and wound. Bob Goff illustrates this truth by sharing a story of his friend who lost a child. At the funeral, a well-intentioned woman tried to show empathy by comparing this man’s loss to the recent passing of her dog. Anyone with family pets knows that a pet is part of the family. Yet, it’s natural to feel appalled at such a comparison—yet the grieving father didn’t react angrily or hurt. Instead, he chose empathy and gently asked, “Tell me your dog’s name.”
This response reminds us that we don’t always have to be “right.” We get to be like Jesus—extending grace and compassion. Sometimes, our best intentions come out all wrong, and sometimes, other people’s words can sting. Yet we’re still called to speak kindly or not at all, refusing to let our words become a weapon that injures those we aim to love.
Why It Matters for You
Think about your own daily interactions. Have you ever said something out of frustration, only to regret it moments later? Maybe you spoke harshly to a coworker under stress or made a sarcastic comment to a friend that landed harder than you intended. James 3:7–8 underscores how difficult it is to truly control our words—they can feel as untamable as wild animals.
Yet God offers a different approach: Instead of letting our tongues run wild, He invites us to surrender our words to Him. The Holy Spirit can guide our speech so that we build others up, especially in sensitive or tense situations. Like Bob’s friend, we can choose a response that prioritizes understanding over our instinct to correct, criticize, or compare.
Practical Insight
- Pause Before Speaking: Give yourself a brief moment—even a single breath—to consider whether what you say is helpful or healing.
- Listen to Understand: When someone shares something difficult or unexpected, try to put yourself in their shoes before crafting your response.
- Offer Grace: Recognize that everyone is facing battles you may not see. A gentle or encouraging word can profoundly affect how they perceive themselves and the situation.
Challenge & Call to Action
Identify one area in your life where your words might be causing harm. Perhaps you use gossip, frequent criticism, or sarcastic digs when stressed. This week, ask God to guard your tongue and guide your heart. Commit to pausing before speaking, and if your words won’t help or heal, consider not saying them at all.
After a few days, reflect on any changes you’ve noticed in your conversations and relationships. Have you seen more grace, understanding, or calm? By focusing on empathetic, compassionate communication, you’ll begin to see the ripple effect of speaking life into others rather than tearing them down.
Love In Chaos teaching series
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Check out The Abide Factor and The Abide Factor Student Workbookfor practical tools to help you grow in your walk with God. These resources are designed to guide you toward the abundant life Jesus promises.
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